A friend of mine recently told me he was looking forward to his senior years when he would have retirement benefits to cover his eventual stay in a hospice before his death, plus funeral arrangements, burial, and tombstone. But this person is nowhere near dead!
I was horrified that he was all about looking forward to preparations for the afterlife. That is, if you believe in an afterlife!
Was he so miserable that he was looking forward to death? And the care he would receive in a hospice?
He had always been very goal oriented. On the contrary, I’ve learned to believe more in the journey towards one’s goal. Goals change like moving sign posts. We have free will and as such, based on our choices, we can determine our journey – to what shall I say, “wherever”?
In my youth when I lived in Asia, I was goal driven in my career as a print journalist. But when I moved to Canada in mid-life, to my great disappointment, I found that print journalism was dead.
The situation forced me to ditch the idea of climbing the career ladder, and I began to follow my heart. I discovered the healing arts, in particular energy healing and creative non-fiction writing.
My point is: I followed my heart, rather than a goal. I am not sure these two fields I had chosen could be “climbed” such as most professions. There was nothing to climb. But there was a lot of love and creativity and genius to be shared. The movement was horizontal and not vertical. I found that this kind of work was more conducive to journeying and not competing. My heart was singing.
We need to enjoy the journey towards happiness. Even better if the journey itself is our happiness. This is not a goal oriented endeavour. Goals move. Situations change. Our experiences change us. We grow, we transform.
It is so important that we enjoy each step of the journey we are taking. Love the journey. Rather than getting too hung up on the goal. Otherwise, one will miss all the beautiful things that happen along the way – as cliched as this may sound.
If one is too focused on a goal, one may also miss the bigger picture – such as asking oneself perhaps, where does this goal stand amidst my achieving happiness in the present, in living out my values, or changing my attitudes towards others into something more positive and compassionate – for example.
In the end, what matters the most is that we’ve loved the journey, and if we’re lucky love the goal which is often a moving target.
In the end what matters most is that we have loved – loved ourselves, our families, our partners, our friends, the community, our country, our pets.
And I tell you, when you are done with your life, all goals, accolades, awards, titles, money, worldly achievements, etc. will have fallen away. You may even ask yourself, what was it all for?
All our lives, the only goal worth working towards is love. Enjoy the journey of love!
Above is a photo of a bridge – the bridge of love from your heart to another’s.
Germaine